Am 50.
Half a century on the face of this earth. I am really amazed, not all who were born on the earth made it this far. When I was in school- maybe around 10 years old, I just couldn't imagine how life would be after another 10 years. Now when I look back, I fail to understand why I thought so.
At 50 you begin to look back and understand where you went wrong, rather than thinking where you were right. You keep thinking what you missed and if you are lucky maybe you will think what you gained over the years. The lesser the regret, better the your quality of life.
Life can never be generalized, this I understood at 50. But there are organic stages that needs to be accomplished. For the first 5 years of life, not much memory will be etched in the conscious regions. The next 5 years would be pretty much similar for most of us. Naughty, bratty, busy bodies, school, home, friends and games.
The first 10 years makes a lot of impression on the course of your future. After this stage is when the real you emerges. Who you are, how you think, this is when differences in personalities are noticed and we form friendships based on this variances.
What is important now comes to the forefront. Education and what you would aspire to become in your later years. By then you are 20 you are on your way after having decided you future course of action or of course you are dragged to some course of action with or without you efforts.
And you become conscious of the worldly standards set for you to toe. You try to break off from it, sometimes for the better or sometimes for the worse.
For me too the first 5 years, I do not retain much in my conscious sphere. The next 5 till the age of 10 yes, I was the naughty kind or didn't think of consequences before attempting anything. Luckily I was in one piece after all those adventures. After 10, I began understanding what life is and thought about the meaning of life.
Of course did not find a satisfactory answer to it.
I started putting more efforts into education and of course sports played a big part in my life. By 15 I was made to understand that you have to go by the age old rules. Study and finish education, get a good job or a well paid one, get married and have children.
So by 20 I find myself in a engineering college and studying hard, even though there are plenty of distractions. My dad is not doing good, he has an incurable sickness and is home- sort of semi-paralyzed. So at around 23 am out to get into the real world. And what to I realize this world of which we had wonderful ideas is really granite underfoot.
Jobs are hard to come by, the situation was bad then. Employers want to know how much you can earn for them and then they want to decide how much of it they are ready to part with to you. And I have a debilitating debacle, I have a speech issue. I find it really hard to communicate, even giving my name is an effort. So there it is, all my education seems to pale because of this.
My parents did not take steps to clear this debacle, but then maybe the medical industry was not so developed regarding such ailments. In their days it did not do much harm to people with such debacle as most would be pen-pushers (the educated lot) and so communication was not imperative to have a lucrative job.
But in this age for you to move higher up the hierarchy, communication was a factor that stood right up there. Your technical education was of use for the first 5 years.
After that it was man management. I took up a degree in management and now was B.E and MBA a very preferred combination that could take you heights. But you still needed communication, to take you up there. This I lacked and it broke my life. The first 5 years I worked like most and when the time came for me to move up in life and job, things became static.
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